[sorcery] The Siamese First Mission (2001) Subbed

 "which cats again?" — https://anidb.net/anime/5539 In the loving [citation needed] memory of Catboy Monkey Punch Translation: Catboy Perevodildo Checking: Catboy Ziusudra RAWs: Catboy hokuto-san (from [this](https://nyaa.si/view/876159) release) Brought to you by the Sorcery Clowder ѫ~ѫ "Lux in Tenebris" As much as I enjoy taking my field notes, no elaborated kvetching can be produced by this clusterfuck of clichés. It's the easiest to bitch about someone else's bad subtitles. If I start bitching about my own bad subtitles, that'd make for one interesting french reacharound. There was this Chinese hardsub, I suppose, but... だめだ! None of us knows any Chinese and whenever I addressed it for difficult lines, it was making it even more mindboggling at best. So, ever since I ended up embarking on this man-made disaster, I'll excuse myself to writing yet another disastrous larger-than-life torrent description full of danking on authors and the genre, shan't I? Such things never get old. The one thing I generally feel for monkey punch's titles is the urge to get over with it ASAP. This movie was no exception. Effectively, I only sent Ziu the crib-gore of a script with the most exhaustive, crude, and cps-merciless variants of translations for the lines, as well as some of the most blatant misspells, leaving him to do the magic for this one. Ziu always ends up rewriting my lines topsy-turvy anyway {unless they present a particularly creative work of eloquence} and I don't necessarily mind it.¯_(ツ)_/¯ Witty wordplay, inventive puns, genuinely fresh pivoting idea... You get nothing of the kind in this movie! You lose! Good day, sir! Instead, this one is of the kind where you encounter a checklist of MP's fetishes as an impedimenta [citation needed]. ~~~~pathos frippery and worship for guns / invincible characters that might as well charge the main villain en garde and leave the crossfire unscratched, while being, by a huge margin, not the sharpest tools in the shed / an arsenal or techopriest N7 machinery that makes minecraft redstone mechanics seem a realistic and sensical model of the real world / "I'll leave you alive for now, gonna come finish you off some time later, clearly not giving you a chance to escape and retaliate" / third act being one big knock-knock joke~~~~ But well, at least it's not 1000 episodes long, which by default makes it better than Lupan as a whole. Before you ask, Odaiba is the most important and well-infrastructured artificial island in the bay of Tokyo, i.e. in the heart of Japan, with a population of Little Rock AR and quite an iconic significance for the Japanese. It goes without saying, Odaiba is bustling 24/7, hardly has any thicket, definitely has no secret military R&N facilities {or that's what I want you to think} and nuclear power plants. If you ever happen to actually watch this fansub, at any point wondering how stupid it would be to run one on this island, wonder no more! The video is, as per my habit, by hSa and terrible: the coloring shifts suggest a 854x480p camrip. On top of that - chinese hardsubs. Bet you're at the edge of your seat already. Had to use the "Opaque box" button for the first and hopefully the last time, also tried my best to cover the original hardsub with it, hence the lines sometimes have breaks in, let's say, unorthodox places, looking like this  Probs never received a home video release because of how schlock it is. Good riddance. Yet without monkey punch, this translation wouldn't have been: Ziusudra expressed his wish to make this available, and I had a half-done script lying around, so I put 2 and 2 together, because I owe Ziu one for making him do some of the initial Lucy-May build-up for me that we eventually had to scrap, even though I personally see this an anime version of an Uwe Boll movie, affectionately dubbing it a Dirty Pair knockoff while not even holding the original dirty pair in any high regard. Shit, I barely managed to find a good screencap to make a half-decent one-time emote of for my server. Well, at least I had my fun goofing around the stupidity of the movie's uninspired decisions in {tl notes}, or slandering it in unneededly gargantuan torrent description that dwarfs in sizes the original movie scenario. Boy I must've inflicted one irretrievable loss on the journalism dept. We did, forsooth, have some hot debate over this sub in the sorcery party server, but I daresay it was due to us being an incompetent bunch, dumping our work on one another, rather than trying to come up with the most elegant translation solution, some of which we impudently stole from catgirl muzunnyawa's suggestions without ever giving him props in credits, hehe😈. But that was all she nyawn for today, see you in other descriptions. Stay nyadrated.